Purpose...

On Sunday, I finished a great book lent to me by a friend here in Lagos. It wasn't a travel book or information about Lagos, but it did pull at my heartstrings.  It's a book she told me about almost 6 months ago...but I thought it was too soon for me to read it.  I knew it would bring back sweet memories of my Bernie....and some painful ones also. For more about Bernie, click here and here.  I don't think I ever understood how much your dog becomes another "being" in your family.  Sometimes, you almost think of them as "human".  I know I didn't feel this way about any dog...even my two dogs my family got when I was in high school....partly because I was too busy trying to be cool with an emphasis on trying and hanging out with my friends. And also because my mom and dad did all the work for them (s orry mom and dad.....I guess I thought I was too far above scooping the poop!)  But, when Guy and I brought Bernie home, she became our whole world.  We had no kids at the time, and since we lived far away from our familes...she was our family.  I can't believe that it has been more than a year since she passed away, and I think of her often.  Last week, I was getting ready in my room and I heard something jingling...I immediately knew it was the unmistakable clinking of her dog tags.  I came out in the living room and saw Jeremy curled up holding her collar with her name tag and his stuffed animal that looks like Bernice. (We have her collar hung on the side of picture of her and Jeremy, you can see above)  He told me "Mommy, I miss Bernie...I don't want her in heaven anymore...I want her here with me."  Of course, the whole sight of him sitting there made my heart crumble, but I knew that I couldn't fall apart. I told him that she had a good long life, and that she was loved and happy.  Now, she didn't have any more pain.  But, after I had him calmed down and we put her collar back, I couldn't help but ask myself if I did give her the best life possible.  Did she know that we truly loved her even when she wasn't our only "baby"?  I always think that with Jeremy we paid a little less attention to her and then when Elizabeth came along, she really got pushed to the side, but I hope she felt we loved her...
So, when I read A Dog's Purpose by W. Bruce Cameron, it was like a breath of fresh air!   It is such a heart warming tale of one dog's journey through many different lives.  It will pull at your heartstrings but, the theme was the same throughout the book.  He always felt love, and he always wanted to please his family. And, his love was always unconditional.   I highly recommend this book to anyone who has ever had a dog or is even just a dog lover.  It is a wonderful book, but I recommend tissues while reading it.  I know it is fictional, but it helped ease my sadness of wondering if Bernie knew we truly loved her.  She will always have a special place in our hearts.  My hope is that wherever Bernie may be she will always feel safe, loved and most importantly... she had a purpose in our lives.:)

Thank You

Thank you to all of you for your thoughts and prayers for Bernie.:) I will get back to posting on the blog...but am going to take a break for a few days. The kids really miss her. Elizabeth keeps asking me,"Why Bernie go to heaven?" and Jeremy has been sleeping with a stuffed toy that looks like Bernie and two of the pictures I printed for him from the previous blog post. It truly is like a death in our family. I miss my "little vacuum cleaner". I never had to sweep the floor after dinner because she was always there to clean up all the crumbs.:)

Again, thank you all for your thoughts and prayers. I'll be back to blogging in a few days.:)

Bernice Edna Salinas

Bernice Edna Salinas

October 1999-February 1, 2011

Bernice Edna Salinas a.k.a. The Swamp Dog, passed away today in our flat in Lagos, Nigeria. She was born on the Westbank in New Orleans, Louisiana and rescued by a wonderful woman named Donette. She was found on the side of the road with her mother who had been hit by a car. Donette took her in and gave her her initial vaccinations and took wonderful care of her with her brother and sisters. She was my Valentine's present in 2000. I still remember going out to Donette's house in New Orleans and being so certain that Guy and I were going to bring a little boy dog home. I was very surprised when Bernie and her two sisters were there...no boys. I had only picked out one name...Bernard... I am not sure why..but I really liked that name.:)

Of course, when we met the dogs, our heart melted for Bernice ( I thought I should change the name from my boy name, Bernard). She was so kind and came right up to us and was the sweetest little thing you had ever seen at three months old. We brought her home and she immediately peed on the bed we had bought for her.:) Guy had always said that any dog of his would never sleep in our bed...but that first night...we tried everything. We put her in our bathroom with stuffed toys which had been rubbed on her sisters, a clock for the heartbeat, and a night light...but she whined and cried so much that Guy finally broke down..and that was it...she was in our room and eventually slept with us in our bed... She earned her middle name from our 84 year old next door neighbor in New Orleans, Edna. Edna was a spunky woman who always cared for Bernie. When I would be gone during the day and Bernie was outside,Edna would go outside in her back yard and spray Bernie with her water hose over the fence to make sure Bernie didn't get too hot.:) Edna loved Bernie...so it was only fitting to give her the same middle name.:)
She has been with us for most of our 12 year marriage. She was there when we moved from New Orleans to Houston. She was there with us for our sad times and our happy times.
She was there when we brought both of our children home. She was there for us when we moved from Houston to Lagos. Over the past months, she was battling severe seizures and we tried to increase her medicine....but it wasn't helping. Her back legs were giving out on a daily basis and Guy and I decided that it was just time ...she stopped eating and drinking water over the weekend, and we knew it was time for her to be out of her pain. We spent today with her, and the kids each drew her a picture to put in her casket with her today. Elizabeth said she drew a picture " so, Bernie could take it to heaven." I also enclosed the above pictures to be buried with her ( these pictures were taken by my friend, Lara, in October 2010). The vet came at about 6:30 p.m. tonight and then, she was gone. She was a wonderful friend and companion and her absence will be felt by our family for years to come. Deciding when it was "her time" was one of the hardest decisions Guy and I have ever had to make....but we realized that she was unhappy and it wasn't fair to her. I truly understand how people can fall in love with their dogs...she was our "one in a million" dog and we will miss her with all our hearts.

A Message from the Swamp Dog

I just received this note from Bernice a little while ago and since I have not gotten my Christmas cards out yet, I thought I would post it on the blog. I will be sending out Christmas cards next week....my planning wasn't so good this year....but hey, now you can look forward to a New Year's Card!!!:)

Swamp Dog Newsletter

Greetings from the “Center of Excellence” in Lagos, Nigeria. Yes, that’s right I said “excellence”. That is what is on all the license plates from Lagos State. I don’t get off the compound very much, but that is what my mom says is on the license plates on all the cars, and when she says it she can’t stop herself from laughing…..I haven’t figured that one out yet.

So, I am typing out my 11^th newsletter for the Salinas family. It is December 24, and I am just now getting around to getting it done. As a matter of fact, one of my very best friends in the whole world, Happiness, is helping me out. I am dictating to her as she types.:) She is a cook, housekeeper, gardener, nanny, personal shopper, dog walker/groomer, and now I can add secretary to her resume.:) My legs just aren’t working like they used to. The arthritis is really bothering my legs and it is making it a little harder for me to get around…not to mention type out a letter. (Thank goodness Mom found a good vet here, and he gave me some great meds!!!) I am 11 years old which makes me about 77 years old in dog years. Why isn’t someone else coming up with what to write in this dang letter anyway? I am the oldest in the family now!!!:)

Let’s see, this year was a busy one. In January, Mom, Jeremy and Elizabeth came back from visiting family and friends in the U.S. We had a pretty quiet February. Jeremy started his first season of tee ball here in Lagos. Then, in March, Mom took Jeremy and Elizabeth back to the U.S. to visit her grandma. Elizabeth also turned two!! In April, they all left me again and went to Siena, Italy to see all the beautiful sights and meet up with mom’s mom and dad and brother over Easter. I also heard that mom did a lot of wine tasting there.:) There was also a story about something mom said in Montepulciano, but I think you have to talk to her personally to get the whole story.:) April was also a good month because some new families moved onto the compound with children just about Elizabeth and Jeremy’s ages. Their moms and dads are pretty nice also, so mom and dad also have new friends. It’s always nice to have such nice people around when you are so far from your own family and friends. In May, Jeremy finished up school, and Mom and the kids took off in early June to do their yearly ”Tour of America” beginning in California, then to Michigan, Illinois and Texas. Lots of doctor’s appointments, and of course the packing of the annual shipment to Nigeria…..I heard that was a lot of work!!! Dad flew over to meet mom and the kids in July and then, they all came back together the end of July. (BTW, Mom turned 34…not sure if she wanted me to mention that!) In August, Jeremy started up pre- k and turned five!!! Elizabeth also started at a little preschool this year a few times a week. The house is a little quieter when she is gone in the mornings, I can use that time to catch up on my sleep.:) The end of August, they all flew back to the U.S. for my Uncle Greg and Aunt Julia’s wedding in L.A. In September, Guy had his 37^th birthday. And sadly, Mom flew back to the U.S. when her lovely Grandma passed away. We will always keep her in our hearts…she was a very special lady. October and November seemed to go by quickly with all the school parties, play dates and get togethers. This brings me to this December. Right now, the flat is quiet, my water and food bowls are freshly washed and I am able to really reflect on this past year. It has been a busy one as usual, but I am always surrounded by my family who loves me (except right now of course because they left me again to see their families in the U.S……maybe I am not always surrounded by my family…I guess that is for another newsletter). But, at least when they are gone, I have Happiness here to take really good care of me. I hope you all find your own “Happiness” this year in your hearts. Don’t forget you can always write to me at Guy Salinas ExxonMobil – Lagos, Nigeria (MOP C-11-D) P.O. Box 4490 Houston, Texas 77210-4490. My phone number is (713)431-8500 ext. 22954. Remember, you can take the dog out of the swamp, but you can’t take the swamp out of the dog! Cheers! Bernice A.K.A. The Swamp Dog

Our First Baby

This last week has been pretty quiet around here. There are still many families who are traveling and are returning next week before school starts. The kids and I are getting a little stir crazy, but enjoying some quiet rest time before school and schedules get crazy.:) I was just thinking today about wishing I was back in the U.S. so I could hop in the car and take the kids to a different park each day when I looked over at Bernice. She was lying on the carpet sleeping. As soon as I got up her tail started wagging a little bit. She has been here since last year and never left the compound, and she has never complained about it.:) She was our first baby, and she is going to be 11 in October. She has been a wonderful part of our family, and I have to say the quietest baby we have ever had. Although she is moving alot slower these days, she is always there for us when we get home with her tail wagging. I know she is a dog, but she can teach me alot about where my home is. For her, it doesn't matter where she is, she is home when we are all together. The first few weeks I get back from the U.S. I am usually in a funk, but I have to think that home is where my family is and right now it is here in Lagos.:)

Bernice A.K.A. The Swamp Dog

I have been so busy with getting the kids in order and with all the traveling, that I forgot I didn't give anyone an update on Bernice. She came over with Guy in June and did okay on the flight. When Guy brought her to the airport in her crate, the woman at the ticket counter had to turn her crate around because she was barking at everyone she could see. She was probably trying to get anyone to get her out if the crate.:) When she arrived here in Lagos, she bonded very well with Happiness.:) They are very cute together. Bernie is always near Happiness' feet wherever she is.:) I don't know if Bernie was too happy to have the kids back in her home. She kind of had an "Oh *#@#!" look on her face when she saw both of them barreling into the apartment. Jeremy and Elizabeth missed her very much, and they immediately started chasing her around. Elizabeth was trying to pull her tail. Poor Bernie kept trying to find some quiet corners in the apartment. Happiness takes her on about three walks a day, andit is so cute to see them together. Jeremy alway wants to go with Happiness also...so he went on a walk with her and Bernie. All the security guards on the compund know Bernie and yell to her as she walks by. It is really funny.:) Our other dog , Ralphie, is on a farm in Cleveland , Texas. He is doing very well. Apartment life would not have been very good for him since he wants to go in and out about 100 times a day.