Summer Break

I hope all of my American friends had a great Fourth of July!  I have decided to take a blogging break for the summer.  I am in the process of adjusting and regrouping, and I am planning to be back here more regularly the end of August.:)  I hope you all have a great summer and I'll see you again in a few weeks!!!

"Normal"

exhaustion!!!!

These past two and half weeks have been filled with happiness at seeing old friends again, nervousness about finding a house, anxiousness about putting an offer on just the right house, elation when that offer was accepted, happiness at Guy being able to join us for almost two weeks, sadness that he had to leave and go back to Nigeria to finish up his job there, worry about safety over there, and exhaustion from everything in between.

We've survived 2 trips to Chuck E.Cheese, at least 5 trips to Sonic, 7 trips to Chick-Fil-A, and umpteen trips to Mickey D's and somewhere in there the kids have even managed to eat some fruit and veggies.:)  They have been troopers through their fourth straight summer of living out of a suitcase.  I don't know how we'll feel next summer when we will actually have a house.  I was starting to feel like I was at home in Lagos, but I never really felt like the flat was "mine".  It was assigned to us, and I always felt like I was living in someone else's house using someone else's furniture.  I am looking forward to living in a home we chose with things that belong to us.:)  Although that home won't be ready for us until August...

This next year will be a struggle for me to find my "new normal" whatever that may be.  But, for right now, my" normal" is packing up our bags for yet another plane ride....this time to see some family in Michigan.  And for the time being, our "home" is wherever our suitcases are.:)

Re-Entry

This past week and a half of coming back to the states has been very different than the last three summers.  When I came back the other summers, I was a visitor, on vacation.  I didn't really jump back into the U.S. culture, but I hadn't really grasped the Nigerian culture either.  I was an "in betweener".  I could have the best of the U.S. fast food restaurants and rationalize it because I couldn't get that in Nigeria.  I could bounce around from friends and family's homes and visit and not have to think about where my children would go to school in August.  It seems that in many ways, my expat life has come to an end and the reality is that if I keep eating at McDonald's the way I have been when I have come back over the last three years for an unknown length of time.....I will probably be as big as Jabba the Hut!!!! 

Things are definitely different this time around.  I feel like I am noticing more because I know I am not leaving this time.  I have had to find a house, and register the the kids for school.  I have been trying to watch how much junk I'm eating.....but it's hard when you are relocating.  I thought I'd share a few things I've learned on my re-entry:

1) Bruno Mars is not a planet

2)  New Direction is not on my navigation system, but it  is one of the latest heart throb boy bands

3)  Nicky Minaj's song "Starship" makes me want to throw my hands up in the air and shake my bum bum

4)  I can consistently drive my self around in a car by myself, and am loving the back up camera on my new car!!!!

5)  My patience has been tested to new limits without having Happiness here to help me with the kids:)

6)  I am not taking the clean, well maintained streets for granted here

7)  I kind of miss the bumpy,flooded streets on V.I. and the okadas whizzing by

8)  I am not the same person I was when I moved away three years ago

9)  I see people differently now

10)  I'm afraid I will become boring....I kind of miss Lagos...yep...that is a huge shocker for me, too!!!

The past few weeks have been full of happiness and confusion for me.  I know I lived here three years ago, but I can't help but feel I am a little different now. Angela, a friend of mine I met in Lagos wrote to me the other day and she said she was so happy for the time she had in Lagos because "it made us all come alive again". I can't agree with her more. I don't know if I realized it when I was there, but I saw so much and did so many things I otherwise would have never done if I hadn't gone.  In a way, living there did bring new life into our lives.  My hope is that that "new life" will stick with our whole family so we can continue to "see" people and celebrate the differences all around us.:)

He's Back...

On Friday, Guy landed back in the good 'ole USA.:)  The kids were so happy to see him and so was I.  It had been a long week of jet lag, househunting and not sleeping. I needed serious reinforcements and I did miss him...just a little bit.:) We were so happy to have Guy with us for Father's Day. For the last three years, the kids and I have traveled out of Nigeria the beginning of June and not returned until the beginning of August.  Guy has always joined us in the U.S. the beginning of July so we haven't been with him on his special day for a while.  It was a great day of eating good barb-e-que and being together with the best dad my children could ever ask for.  And it was topped off by some pictures of our trip to South Africa with some frames from the real Lekki Market in Lagos, Nigeria...not Houston, Texas (Poor elizabeth....she is so confused.:)

Happy Father's day to my dad, Father-in -Law, Grandpa and all the great dads today!:)

Gold

It is so interesting to me how life always seems to work out.:)  It has been a little bit of a sad and confusing week (not to mention the jet lag) since coming back to the U.S. from Lagos, but it always seems like the universe seems to balance itself out.  As lost as I felt a few days ago, these past two days have been filled with hugs and smiles from some dear friends right here in the U.S.  Laughs, hugs, and some glasses of wine with a good friend can take all the sadness away.:)

My "silver" friend from Lagos in Houston.:)

And a waffle the shape ( and size) of Texas can bring a smile to any one's face.:) ( Courtesy of our hotel).

Lizzy was camera shy!!!???

These are friends I had before moving to Lagos (thank you Amy and Jim for having us over!) and who have stuck with me the entire time I was gone. And, guess what!!??? They are here to welcome me back!:) There is one more dear friend who I haven't been able to see yet.( Although I did get to see her husband who graciously let me store some of my very heavy bags from Lagos in their home.  THANK YOU!!!!)  She has been traveling to see her family, and she'll be back next week! Once I see Emmy again, it will most definitely feel like I am back home.:) Last year, I wrote a post called Silver and Gold about the new friends I made while living in Lagos.  I am so thankful for my "gold" friends for sticking with me on this three year adventure even though you didn't understand it all the time. My friends, Jen,Mindy,and Kirstin who didn't live near me before but have always been just a phone call away have also been there for me and supported me.:) I thank all of you for everything you did to not make me feel like I was a crazy fool for going to Lagos. You all let me go on this journey and then, were ready to welcome me back into your lives with open arms.   I am so thankful to have you in my life.  You are my "gold".  Thank you for welcoming me back home:)

Jeremy and his Godparents:)

Pieces

I'm awake right now when I should be sleeping, but I was reading a blog post earlier about having domestic help in your home and feelings about that, and I couldn't help but think of Happiness.  When I moved to Nigeria, I never in a million years would have thought I would have made such a wonderful friend.  I never would have thought that I could make such a wonderful friend and when I had to leave one day, I would probably never get to see her again.  I couldn't help the tears from falling down my face as I read that post and then thought about it tonight.  I am happy to be back in the U.S. and to see all of my friends here. It's just that I feel like a left a piece of myself in Lagos with a dear friend.  I've taken the kids to a few places here and seen them laugh, and I know she would love to see it, too.  Part of why my kids have done as well as they have on our move to Nigeria is because of her...  ( and of course because of my hubby's meticulous planning!)

  

all smiles at Chuck E. Cheese

• brain freeze at Chick-Fil-A

 Moving is hard, and I know I will get through this change.  People have told me that moving back home after having an assignment as an expat is hard.  It's funny because I would look so forward to "civilization" when I would come back to the States on holidays.  But, now, I realize that I was just starting to really think of Lagos as home, and it was time to leave.  I kind of feel like the mancala (ayo)  game that Jeremy loves so much.  You take some pieces and you leave some pieces.  I guess that is kind of how life is, too.  You leave some pieces of yourself with dear people you have met, and you take some pieces of them with you, too.  And, I have to say, leaving a piece of myself in Lagos does hurt a bit, but I would do it all again because it brought a very special person into my life.:)

Tidal Wave

The kids and I made it to Houston at 5 a.m. local time yesterday morning.  It was nice to sleep on a fully flat seat in business class, but we still didn't sleep all that great.  There is just something about sleeping on an airplane that doesn't let me ( or the kids) get a really good sleep.  I was able to get all 9 bags and four carry ons to the car rental place with the help of another sweet family who was repatriating to the States along with me.  Thank you so much!!!:)  Thank goodness Guy rented us an Expedition or I wouldn't have been able to fit all the bags!!:)
We made it to the hotel only after stopping at McDonald's for our U.S. fix!!:)  Then, the kids and I took a marathon nap from noon to 5 p.m.  I usually never let them sleep that long after traveling from Nigeria, but I don't know if it was the physical exhaustion combined with the emotional exhaustion of the last few weeks and the roller coaster of emotions I have had but I could not move from the bed until 5 p.m.  I made the kids wake up or else we might as well grow hair on our ears and hang upside down because letting them sleep any  longer was surely a recipe for nocturnal disaster!:)   We went to good 'ole Wal Mart and got some snacks for the room and went to another favorite of Jeremy's...Taco Bell!!! I know, I should win" Mother of the Year" award for the nutritional food I'm feeding the kids!!!! :)  But, I'll blame it on exhaustion and whatever makes 'em happy at this point!:)  They keep asking me if this hotel is our new home, and I keep telling that that we need to find a home.  They both look at me like it's crazy that we don't have a "home" right now.  I guess it is...

We're doing okay, but every now and then, a tidal wave of emotions sweep over me.  I think of my final hug to Happiness before we boarded the bus knowing I most likely will never physically see her again.  The look in her eyes and the tears running down her face as the kids and I waved good bye to her and as I blew her a kiss through the window she grabbed it in mid air and placed her hand on her heart. It was so hard to leave.  I didn't ever think it would have been three years ago. 

When the kids and I were in the Wal-Mart (Elizabeth keeps calling it Lekki Market..I'm not kidding) yesterday, I noticed a woman in traditional Nigerian dress.  At first I didn't think anything of it, and then I realized I was in Houston...in a Wal- Mart!!  I heard her talking to her daughter in the familiar Nigerian accent, and I almost went up to her.  But, I couldn't because I realized I had tears in my eyes and no matter what I would say to her ( I had no idea what that may be) I wouldn't be able to say anything because all that would come was tears.

I feel a little lost and confused right now. Sometimes I think I am just on summer holiday visiting the U.S. and then, I realize that I'm not going back to Nigeria in August.   This transition will be a process, but I know one thing for sure.  Our family found" happiness" in Nigeria and I know we'll find it here, too.:)